Monday, October 5, 2015

Despair behind the "Super Mom"

You have it all planned out. You even wrote it in your new fancy decked out planner.

5:00am - Wake up
5:15am - Devotions
5:45am - Exercise
6:55am - Shower/breakfast
7:30am - Kids wake up/breakfast
8:30am - Start homeschool day

REALITY CHECK What really happens? 5:00am - hit the snooze because you actually didn't get to sleep until about 2:00am. Baby decides to wake up around 6:00am just because you were so motivated to exercise for the first time in 3 months. Toddler comes downstairs at 7:15am fighting for a spot on your lap, both are hungry, no breakfast has been made, and the husband just left for the gym. Homeschool doesn't actually get started until 10:00am because you've been cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, making bottles, disciplining the older children, and trying to figure out which lesson everyone was on. Did I mention that you haven't even changed out of your pajamas yet? Does this sound all too familiar? If it doesn't then you are one lucky mom, either that or you've figured out this thing called motherhood. I will admit that I have not. With 7 children I have tried to get more organized and ahead of things but let's face it, most days I'm stuck at the starting line. I love my planner, I have 4 of them, but that's another post. I write in almost all of them, I plan out my day, week, and month. Problem is: Life Happens!

On the days that I have to go to work things are pretty put together. I start at 7pm so I wake up by 5am and I do run away to the gym before anyone wakes up. I'm home and showered by 7am, start breakfast and bottles for the day, have a Bible study with my hubby and wait for the first early riser to come traipsing down the stairs for snuggle time. The household is usually bustling by 9am, and I start homeschooling by 9:30am. I wrap things up by 1:30pm so they can eat lunch and I can go take a nap by 2pm. By 4pm I'm up again to make dinner, shower, and make more bottles for the night and morning before leaving for work at 5:30pm. I work a 12 hour shift at the hospital so I don't get home until 8:30am-9am. On the days I work, the day is scheduled and on point, problem is, I only work 2-3 days a week, the rest of the week is crazy.

People see our family and take peeks into our lives and think that we have it all together, think that I run a tight ship, think that I am "super mom." I am a far cry from that, in fact most days I am a hot mess. On the really bad days, I yell, I cry, I clean, I don't eat, and I don't take a nap. There have been many days when I tell myself and God, "I can't do this anymore," as if God is going to tell me, "Ok, you can leave now and go have a life of your own." No, instead he says: "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9.

As women of faith and role models to our daughters, we must remember that God will give us rest, he will never leave us or forsake us. Simplify your life, stop scheduling so many things in one day that you become overwhelmed and insufficient. Be a joy and be flexible. If you are so hardened and set in your ways, the Lord cannot mold you and sculpt you into the beautiful masterpiece that he wants you to be. Pull closer to him in your time of despair. He will raise you up on eagle's wings. Being a mom wasn't supposed to be easy, it doesn't come with a manual, it only comes with the expectation that you will love your littles and teach them right. There's no such thing as "Super Mom" so stop trying to achieve an idea that was never purposed for you in the first place. Just be the mom that the Lord has chosen and blessed you to be.